Art
Siegel

Harnessing The Power Of Body Language In Selling

In sales situations, it is common for people to conceal what they are really thinking, either consciously or unconsciously. It's all part of a natural resistance some people have when being sold to. That's why the most successful salespeople learn the art of Harnessing The Power Of Body Language In Selling.

Why is body language so important? There are two principal reasons:

• You have probably heard many times that people remember more of what they see than what they hear. Long after a meeting, we are likely to have forgotten the exact words someone used, but we may retain a vivid image of the same person's facial expression.
  
  
• Through life experience, we have learned, perhaps unconsciously, that people often lie with words. (We're talking here about the little white lies and omissions that are part of many conversations.) But facial expressions and other body language tend to be more honest. When a person's words and body language are consistent, we believe that person. When a person's words and body language say different things, we tend to believe the body language and doubt the words.

Picture this scenario: You say to a friend: "How was your review with the boss?" Your friend says, "OK." Then her smile vanishes, and her hand tightens around the notebook she is carrying. Did your friend really do OK in that review? Probably not, but she does not want to talk about her true feelings right now. When a person's facial expression differs from her words, your experience tells you to go with the visual cues, not the words.

The Vocabulary Of Body Language

Body language, unlike spoken language, is inexact, so you have to be careful about how you interpret it. A certain movement or facial expression may be quite meaningful, or it may mean nothing at all. As a starting point, the lists below provide you with some common body language terms and their generally accepted meanings:

Positive Body Language

Positive body language is generally quite reliable as an indicator of a person's feelings. It signals interest in the other person and in the conversation.

Relaxed posture
Comfortably seated, relaxed breathing, no visible stiffness or abrupt movements. These indicate no major barriers to communication.

Arms relaxed
Uncrossed arms and open hands (palms up or otherwise visible to the other person) are signs of openness.

Good eye contact
Looking in the other person's eyes, particularly when he is speaking, indicates interest in that person. Proper eye contact involves looking away occasionally to avoid staring.

Nodding agreement
When nods are used to punctuate key things the other person has said, they signal agreement, interest and understanding. However, continual unconscious bobbing of the head usually indicates that the listener is tuning out.

Taking notes
Shows interest and involvement, particularly if notes are on what the other person is saying.

Smiling or adding humor
This is a very positive sign. It signals a warm, personal relationship.

Leaning closer  
Reducing the distance between two people, particularly when the other person is speaking, indicates interest is up and barriers are down.

Gesturing warmly
Talking with hands, particularly with palms open, indicates involvement in the conversation and openness to the other person.

For all of these positive gestures, moderation is the rule. When they are exaggerated, they can become more negative than positive.

Negative Body Language

Negative body language is somewhat less reliable as an indicator of the person's comfort with the current conversation than positive body language. Actions that are generally considered negative may just be a matter of comfort for this person, may indicate that the person is tired, or may result from other matters that are weighing on this person's mind.

Tense body
Stiffness, wrinkled brow, jerky body motion, hands clasped in front or palms down on the table can indicate concern with the topic or dealing with the other person.

Arms folded in front
This creates a barrier and can express resistance to what is being said.

Hand on face
A hand over one's mouth is a closed gesture. Leaning on one's elbow with the chin in the hand can communicate boredom.

Fidgeting
Moving around a lot, playing with things and drumming fingers are usually signs of boredom, nervousness or impatience.

Arms behind head, leaning back
In a well-established relationship, this can be a relaxed gesture. In a new relationship, it is often used to express a desire for control or power.

Yawning
This signals boredom or confusion. The other person is talking too much or in too much technical detail.

Impatience
Some signs are trying to interrupt what the other person is saying or opening one's mouth frequently as if to speak.

Distraction
Eyes flicking about, blank stares, flipping through literature without really reading it, looking at others in the office or looking at the person's body or clothing all represent distraction.

Leaning away
Avoiding moving closer, even when something is handed to the person, is strongly negative.

Negative facial expressions
These include shaking head, eyes narrowed, scowling or frowning.

Combinations Count More Than Individual Gestures

Body language is more meaningful when several expressions take place at the same time. For example, the combination of leaning forward, nodding and smiling is a strong indication of agreement and openness. Most meaningful is a matched set of gestures, which also agrees with what the person is saying.

Transitions Count More Than Positions

As a rule of thumb, individual body positions or movements are frequently meaningless. Some people's faces form a smile or a frown more naturally than a neutral expression. Some people lean on their hand all the time; others never do it. Some people can't sit in a chair for more than a few minutes without crossing their arms; others sit erect with their hands at their sides.

What is meaningful, however, is a transition from one body position to another. If a person spends the entire meeting leaning forward, that may be just comfort. But if the same person starts out leaning back and then gradually moves forward as the meeting progresses, that's non-verbal communication.

Using Body Language Effectively

There are two ways you can use body language to enhance your face-to-face meetings:

1. Observe the customer's body language.
2. Control your body language.

Observing The Customer's Body Language

From the moment you greet the customer, observe the customer's body language. At the beginning of the meeting, it is normal for customers to appear somewhat reserved or nervous. If this is a new relationship, the customer may not be ready to trust you yet. As the meeting progresses, the customer should normally warm up and begin to display more open body language.

Pay particular attention to any changes in the customer's body language, both positive and negative. Positive moves are buying signals -- you are on the right track and should keep going in the direction where you are headed. Negative moves are objections. They mean that you and the customer are beginning to diverge. Stop the track you are on, and get back in sync with the customer:

• If the customer's body language is expressing discomfort or disagreement with what you are saying, you need to uncover the basis for the customer's discomfort and restore the positive track.
  
  
• If the customer is dropping out of the conversation, it is time to stop talking and ask an open-ended question to get the customer involved again. The more the customer has drifted from the conversation, the more you must go back to the customer's goals and background -- something the customer knows a lot about and cares about.

SeaBird Associates Inc
3011 NE 7th Drive
Boca Raton, FL 33431
Phone: 561-750-9233
E-mail: Art Siegel

About Art Siegel